Friday, 12 February 2010

Poll: Is it acceptable to torture Richard Littlejohn?

60% of Daily Mail readers think its perfectly acceptable to torture you if they suspect that you're a terrorist.

Personally, I think that torture is great and I suspect that the "journalist" Richard Littlejohn (Sun, Daily Mail) is an amoral thug who just needs a bit of pressure applied to him in order to confess to his crimes.

If you ask me, he probably started the Reichstag Fire in 1930s Germany. Just a hunch. Personally, I don't have any truck with namby-pamby liberal concepts like "evidence".

My sophisticated interrogation methods will reveal the truth:

Me: "Did you start the Reichstag Fire?"
Littlejohn: "No."


Me: "Let's start again with my finger in your eye socket shall we?"

Former Minnesota governor Jesse Ventura once remarked that if he was allowed to waterboard Dick Cheney, that the vice president would confess to the Sharon Tate murders.

I think he has a point.

The ignorant, amoral thugs who voted "yes" in that Daily Mail poll have apparently never heard of the Spanish Inquisition. It has also never occured to them that white British people might get tortured on home soil.


Anonymous said...

Quid pro quo. Littlejohn's blather has tortured many.

sound money man said...

@Gandhi: Too right mate.

Actually, I need to get my cover story worked out.

When the authorities start flying LPUK supporters out to eastern europe for sleep management, prolonged postural challenges and generally co-ercive slapstick it will no doubt come in handy.

I know I can take a good beating, but if they start playing Enya on a loop, I fear I might give them Chris Mounsey's mobile number.

Anonymous said...

Arghhh! Yes mas'er, world government yessir, Toby be good a n_____! #watches_Roots_more_often_than_Kwame_Kwei-Armah